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Seamus Hinkle earns 50 demerits for gaseous distraction in the library • Intramural football game cancelled due to footballs being stolen • Abraham Hansen earns 100 demerits for clogging toilets in girls' bathroom • Lemon Oliver earns 60 demerits for lighting custodian's toupee on fire • Make sure to wear formal attire on one day only: Parents' Day! • Carter Montgomery earns 20 demerits for feigning broken arm during dodge ball game • Lucas Horn earns 100 demerits for burping entire Pig Latin alphabet • An UltraStink Bomb was lost in the Kanteen today. If found, please call the Hoodlum Hotline • Mr. Tempest advises history students to bring lots of water for tomorrow's hike • Gabby Ryan earns 15 demerits for stealing Carla Simmons' bubble gum-flavored lip gloss • Good Samaritans fail to catch intruder at Annika's house. Fish sticks left behind • If your favorite food changes, please let the Kanteen staff know! • Priscilla Todd earns 10 demerits for hitting Fern Noogan with tennis ball • Austin Baker earns 5 demerits for tying Sam Fitzgerald's shoelaces together • The Kommissary just received new Hydra-Bomb shipment. Get yours NOW! • Supercool, limited-edition K-Shots are going fast! Get one at the Kommissary before they're gone! • K-Pak screen scrambled? K-Mails lost? Please contact Kilter's IT Department!
Welcome to Kilter Academy!
Kilter Academy for Troubled Youth doesn't accept just anyone. Each semester, the admissions board receives thousands of applications and fills only thirty slots. Acceptance is based on a number of criteria, the most important being a student's natural talent for bad behavior. Should your application be accepted, you will join this elite establishment and train among the best of the best to become a professional Troublemaker.
To help with your application for the next Kilter Academy class, the school is lending you this K-Pak loaded with transitional information so you understand what you may be in for. Here's a quick guide to what you'll find:
K-MAIL - Check back often for the most current information on Kilter Academy.
PRANKS - The Official Kilter Academy Troublemaking Handbook, so you can get started on your path to mischief-making immediately.
HOODLUM HOTLINE - No one likes a tattle-tale. If you feel like you need to use this, maybe you should watch the initiation video again...
TEACHER PROFILES - A quick look at exactly who you'll need to impress-and mess-with your pranking talents.
SCHOOL MAP - The Kilter Academy school yards at a glance. Not included? The best hiding spots from Good Samaritans for those moments when your Hydra-Bomb goes off a second too soon.
KOMMISSARY - You'll need a few more demerits before we can let you into the Kommissary.
TROUBLEMAKERS - If you are accepted, you'll be placed into the Troublemaking group that most closely matches your natural Troublemaking ability. Drop an email to our last new student, Seamus Hinkle, and he might be able to help you figure out where you'd land.
THE BOOK - The most important piece of information you'll need to gain acceptance to Kilter Academy.
The KA Welcome Team
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